I’ve been working from home 100% for well over a year now. As a result, I’ve been having more online meetings than ever before and I’m sure I’m not alone. 

Conversations that may have previously taken place while in the office kitchen making a tea, or on a lunch break, now need to be specifically scheduled as a virtual meeting instead. As people have been acclimatising to this sudden increase in virtual meetings, I think some weird and wonderful expectations around virtual meetings have inadvertently been set. 

Inspired by a recent podcast (recorded by some of my colleagues) entitled “Is it ok to f***ing swear now?” I’ve come up with my own “Is it ok…?” list for virtual meetings. 

Is it ok to decline a virtual meeting? 

I think there is an assumption that people who work from home somehow have 100% availability because they are at home. I also think some people who work at home feel that they have to accept every meeting request to ‘prove’ that they are, in fact, working – despite being at home. 

If a meeting request drops in my diary that clashes with other commitments (anything from other meetings to nursery dropoffs) I will decline it, or better – suggest a new time that I can attend. I don’t think anyone should feel under pressure to attend virtual meetings just to prove that they are working. A clash is a clash and you really can’t be in two places at once. 

Is it ok to turn your camera off?

I remember working from home intermittently a few years ago, when it was a rarity to see people turn their cameras on during virtual meetings. Now I feel it’s gone the other way, and rarely do you see people with their cameras off during meetings. If people do have their camera off, there’s almost always a reason provided. “My camera is off because I’m at a coffee shop / my wifi is bad / I’m having work done to the house.” 

I think this relates to my previous point about people feeling that they have to ‘prove’ they really are working, and by implication the lack of camera feed of your face implies that you’re not working. I’ve seen loads of articles over the past year about video meeting fatigue – it’s a real thing and I think we should all be allowed to give ourselves a break and be off camera sometimes. Being on camera for meetings is weirdly more exhausting than just being in person.  

Is it ok to eat during a virtual meeting? 

I’m lucky enough to have a pretty good headset for my virtual meetings. That means that if you are eating, the sound of your chewing is coming very clearly and very directly into my earholes. I have to say, I’m not a fan – but I realise sometimes needs must if people are back to back. 

Is it ok if your family/pet/the postman is on screen during your virtual meeting? 

I think this one is all about context. I’ve been on many calls with colleagues that I know very well and have a great working relationship with, and in that case it’s no problem to see their kids/other halves make a guest appearance. My husband decided to interrupt one of my calls the other day to show me a giant spider that he had just caught in the kitchen. (Gah – I wish I could blur my real background!) 

However, if I were having a tricky customer meeting, or talking about a very sensitive subject, I’d try to make sure that nothing from my surroundings was going to disrupt the meeting. 

Is it ok to end a virtual meeting early?  

The default time setting for most virtual meetings is 30 minutes – but if the purpose of the meeting is solved within 10 minutes, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with saying ‘Thanks! Bye!’ and gifting yourself and the other attendees some unexpected time back in their day. 

On the other hand, I do also think that spending some time on chit chat with colleagues is beneficial too. We’re all humans thrown together to work and the more we know about each other the kinder we can be. 

Would love to hear some other ‘is it ok?’ questions around virtual meetings – I’m sure there are loads that I’ve missed!